So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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