Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize