is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Randomize