so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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