marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
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