so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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