we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
