I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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