oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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