You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Randomize
