I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Last night i stole a disco ball from a frat house by pretending i was pregnant.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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