i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Randomize
