Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
