butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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