i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
