I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
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