Dude, I woke up at my ex's house. I am spooning her half naked roommate. There is a pizza on my shoulder. I need you to come pick me up.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I forget how to act sober
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize