I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
