She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
