Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
