We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
