You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
