Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
