Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Randomize
