Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
