I think I died a long time ago.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
