after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
We are two peas in an std pod
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
