We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
