dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
