I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize
