BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
