THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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