So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
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