Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
