i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
