i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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