Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
There are leaves in my underwear?
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