Nicole vs. Life
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
