Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
