I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize