i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
