Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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