So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
