I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
