So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize
