i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I need water and some morals
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
