So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
