The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
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