Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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