guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
