I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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